How Many Newspaper Execs Does it Take?

November 06, 2008

How Many Newspaper Execs Does it Take?

Following up on the news of the American Press Institute's plans to convene 50 newspaper execs for a one-day summit next week to come up with ideas to save the industry, a friend asks, "How many newspaper CEOs does it take to change the business?"

OK, I'll bite. Possible answers:

50--One to hold the lightbulb and the other 49 to turn the socket.
50--But not this 50.
50--One to hold the lightbulb and 49 to bitch that readers and advertisers just don't understand why fire was a better source of light.
50--One to take notes (on paper, of course), and 49 to rearrange the deck chairs.
100--OK, who invited the circulation guy who inflates the numbers?
50--Five who might actually understand what's going on and 45 to rush the bar the second the meeting is over.
44--The other six lost their jobs in the week before the meeting.
50--10 who are looking for jobs on craigslist and 40 who still aren't sure what craigslist is.
50--10 who think blogs are evil, 10 who haven't figured out how to turn on their Blackberries, 10 who didn't show up because their assistant forgot to print out the e-mail containing the invitation, 10 who still think the API is a relevant organization and 10 who think the Internets are a series of tubes.
None--Why do we need change? Did you see how many copies of the Obama paper we sold?

Nov 6, 2008 4:15:11 PM | Business, Newspapers, The Web

6 Comments

You failed to note a few points:
-- The keynote speaker at this event is Steve Miller, author of The Turnaround Kid: What I Learned Rescuing America’s Most Troubled Companies. The book tells his story about being an executive with the Chrysler auto company, and a Delphi auto parts executive. Well, we all know what condition Detroit is in. What is he going to tell newspaper execs: if they want to protect their monopolies, they need to follow the path of the auto monopolies and stream to Washington for a government bailout soonest or they are going to be out of business?
-- In what must certainly be a sign of the times, the API says this is going to be all-expense-paid for newspaper execs, including free room and board at an exclusive Reston, Va., hotel. And $500 in travel subsidies. Considering that most of the newspaper executives attending aren't going to get much of a bonus this year, and certainly are struggling on their six or seven-figure salaries.
-- The event is convening on Nov. 13, the 300th anniversary of the surrender of Bonnie Prince Charles troops in Scotland. Speaking of lost causes. I bet they newspaper execs are going to drink a lot of scotch to that event.
-- The press is excluded, and the remarks of newspaper execs are to be on a not for attribution basis.

Posted by: edward | November 06, 2008 at 04:43 PM